Worst day,... ever
Man yesterday I was doing a double shift, first time using a frying pan to demo with. And my boss walked in on me. I was so unprepared, and I think Im gonna get fired.
These are some of the things I did wrong:
1) Forgot my apron and hat.
2) Forgot half my equipment that I was supposed to use.
3) Lost something that I just bought.
4) Cut myself with the knife.
5) Forgot the "Caution HOT" sign that meant I was breaking the law.
Man If i was my boss I would fire myself. I am swearing that I will never ever get caught out like that. I could not look at her in the eye. She's the nicest boss ever, and this is all I can think about. DAMNIT.
I WILL NEVER EVER BE THIS NOT-PREPARED. FOR ANYTHING. EVER AGAIN. Especially for work, if i dont get fired. I swear it.
I will be a reliable, dependable, prepared, near-anal girl.
A huge thanks to Josh. I worked for 9 hours straight yesterday, and finished about 9pmish.. and when I came home he came over and made dinner - yes people, cooked dinner, and tried to cheer me up. Was such a mess yesterday. THen we watched Frasier and some Comedy festival, and instead of playing computer games with Aaron and Jerry, he stayed a little while longer to keep me company so as to take my mind off stuff. And today, for going shopping with me, because I know that he ABSOLUTELY hates shopping with me, because I
1) Dont know where Im going.
2) Dont know what I am going to buy.
But thats another story, so I'll end here.
To sum up, responsible, reliable and PREPARED people.. thats the way Im gonna try to be.
deb's outta there..
Submission ??
(In a fake shakesphere hand movement and english accent) "WHAT IS THIS WORD!! Sub-Miss-on u say??" "Never heard of it!! Spot of tea??" lol ok before i get too sidetracked.
Well.. tonight GRIP was fun. Afterwards, Aaron, Eunice, Josh, Me, Kim, Daniel and Ben went out for supper at Australian Pizza House. In Singapore it would be the equivalent of going to the Prata House for supper. :)
But yeah when we were there we got to talking about efficiency, and Josh made this remark about people not turning up late and ways to keep people accountable for this. And, long story short, when I tried saying that i didnt think it was a problem, he kinda went "Yeah you WOULD say that Cos u always rock up late"
Yeah I got kind of angry about it. Scared, guilty and then angry is a more accurate way of describing it. Because sometimes I rock up late, and I cant be bothered. And I KNOW that it ANNOYS Josh, and I KNOW that it pisses him off, but I guess sometimes I'm can be pretty spiteful. Yeah so..
After that I went over to Josh's house to get Heroes. THis is at 12am in the morning. THere, we have a huge fight. So we're sitting in my car at 1am. He tells me I have a problem with athority, and I bring up Russell Peters concert last year, where he was so DAMN LATE to pick me up that we ended up being late and quarrelling the whole evening. Don't ask me why i thought of that - I just did.
But the amazing thing about Josh is, even though he is angry - Even though you can so clearly see that he's PISSED OFF.. he still reasons as if he's not. He has an amazing, wonderful ability to talk things through, and be really annoyingly annalytical about it. And he can make jokes when he's angry (kind of.. a little sarcarstic, but funny nonethe less). When I get angry I just start going off, and nothing makes sense, but its so different with him.
So yeah, he made me see. Its Not that I have a problem with Authority - I don't. Its only when JOSH IS THE AUTHORITY over me that I have a problem. If someone else - ANYONE ELSE said what he said to me, I'd be more likely to take it on board, and listen carefully and actually make amends. BUT ITS JOSH!!!!!
Like for instance, he's incharge of musicians, and me being a bassist, I am UNDER HIM. So, when he tells people to rock up for practice EARLY, i rock up LATE On purpose. JUST TO annoy him. BUT IF ANYONE ELSE told me to come early, i would be there. EARLY too.
Which makes me wonder.. WHY in hell do I react the way I do? After sitting in the car stoning for awhile, the answer finally came. Its cos I see Josh as an EQUAL, and not someone above me. My relationship with him is horizontal, not vertical. I know to some of you it may seem really obvious, but when you're a couple, and he's over you, its a FULL different experience. Like.. I cant describe it. Other people see Josh as a HUGE AUTHORITY on worship. I think they kind of see me as one too. But Josh is the main nugget. I mean MAN. And its hard for me, as his girlfriend to be under him sometimes, and tell HIM where to go at others (yes people Im the MAN in the relationship) .. KIDDING!!!! :) But I do boss him around quite abit, and being the melacholic/phleg he is, he doesnt really mind and does what he's told most of the time. MOST. :)
I GUESS i have to learn teachability and submission from him. GOD TEACH ME how to submit to him and be nice. HElp me enhance his ministry, and not question him. I HAVE TO learn this. I KNOW i Do. JUst give me time - Im not perfect yet.
Oh yeah, we made up our argument. I dont call him Josh anymore - I call him "SIR".
deb's outta there..
